My Mind
by GalWivAGunblade
Summary: A four way relationship between vincent, cloud, sephiroth and squall. not as oddcrapweirdstupidperverted as it sounds. apologies for lame name.


**Disclaimer: as usual, I own nothing. Save the plot.  
  
Warning: yaoi, lemon if I can be bothered to write it, and a lil OOCness. A big relationship between four bishònen . How can ya say no?  
  
Basic char. Descriptions: (as I said, OOC, so I'll briefly explain the roles)  
  
Cloud: the baby, or so he feels. Youngest, weakest and the most inexperienced of the four. Started this four way thing by dating Leon, falling for Vincent... and... Well, everyone has fucked Sephiroth at one point.  
  
Leon: the silent, angry, moody teen one. Leon was only actually interested in Cloud, but ended up with a crush on Vincent. Sephiroth... well, he chose Leon.  
  
Vincent: the smart one. Possibly the only guy in this story who's mind isn't focused on sex. Probably the only character that's still in character. The dark, poetic, intellectual one.  
  
Sephiroth: homicidal maniac, now driven away from that particular career by an over-active sex drive. There have been many arguments as to where his heart actually resides, but Seph is happy with his proclamation that "I will fuck anything that walks".  
  
Ok, this chappie doesn't have much plot, so think of it as an intro. Hence the name.  
**  
_Chapter 1: reflection  
_  
'Mmmrph....' 'Stupid bee....' 'Fly...' 'Fly harder....' 'Not gonna work....' 'No, 's a stupid bee...' '... damn stubborn sometimes...' '....stupid sonic come down here...'  
  
They were obviously all awake, and talking. Cloud wasn't. He was lying in bed, not asleep but simply refusing to move his lazy ass, a means of procrastination enjoyed by every human being. Well, besides maybe Vincent. Random bits of conversation floated through the thin walls and swam around Cloud's sleep-addled mind.  
  
By the sounds of things, Leon was trying to clock sonic heroes. For the fifth time. Well, he had a point. Charmy really was a stupid bee. Vincent, as usual, was remaining the realist, pointing out that "Charmy is a small, gay, stupid bee; therefore, it is impossible for him to keep a ninja chameleon (w00t spelt that right straight off) and a ghetto crocodile airborne for more than a few seconds. Obviously."  
  
Somehow, Cloud could tell Sephiroth was angry, or simply not there. He wasn't talking, and there where no slight moans from Leon, or whimpers from the black haired sniper.  
  
So, he wasn't flirting his hair off.  
  
Like he usually did.  
  
Sephiroth had always struck Cloud as odd.  
  
Even when he was Cloud's worst enemy, the blonde had ended up pondering about the one winged angel.  
  
He wore tight leather clothing at all times, a rather kinky jacket, knee high boots with more belts on, and his evil smirk was more of a flirtatious "you know you want me" preen. Sephiroth had always been the forward one.  
  
The green eyed man was ridiculously attractive though. Pretty eyes, wholesome (yet rather pointy) face, long soft hair, a killer smile, a body any man would kill to own and any woman would kill to touch. Seriously, everything about him seemed to be seductive. He could butter bread and give Cloud an uncomfortable feeling in his trousers. His walk had obviously been practiced. It was a combination of swaying his hips and idly swinging strong legs. Sooooooooooooooo evil, but sooooooooooooooo hot.  
  
Sephiroth, quite honestly, could commit sexual harassment by sitting quietly in the next room reading a book.  
  
Vincent, on the other hand, wasn't. You wouldn't look at him and instantly love him. Cloud had, but that was different. The thing was, no one ever really had looked at Vincent. He was absolutely gorgeous, but he always tended to be at the back of every picture, thinking. At times, Vincent had a way of blending in so much he stood out. Like a song in your head you can't remember.  
  
If you looked straight at Vincent, and he looked back, you would see him.  
  
Those crimson eyes could tell you more than a thousand words could.  
  
Eyes that would twinkle with amusement (usually at something only he knew), glow with admiration, sparkle like a kings ransom at night, tear up with sorrow (a little too much for Cloud's liking), narrow with anger, glaze over with passion...  
  
Yeah, they were blood red. But they were mahogany, crimson, scarlet, burgundy, flecked with gold, brown, auburn, all at the same time. Sometimes, they flashed bright red, almost a pink. But, at other times, they would become a glossy sombre brown.  
  
His eyes themselves had been the main reason Cloud fell in love with the gunner. They were big, pretty, outlined with thick sooty lashes. This combined with the slight delicate nose, and thin lips, gave the appearance of a bambi-eyed supermodel. Without the hair. Vincent's hair had always worried Cloud a little. It was black silk, when the bishònen could be bothered to brush it. But he didn't. So it exploded, like a soft ebony firework, out of his red headband, slightly brushing his face when it dangled back down again. It was beautiful, but slightly scary. Like Sephiroth.  
  
Then there was him. Vincent himself wasn't much to look at. Despite common belief, Vincent wasn't thin. He was just very narrow. He was well built, slim, white and elegant. But, nothing special.  
  
With a big, golden, metal claw, those ruby eyes, the explosion of hair and generally awkward pose, he was Vincent Valentine.  
  
He would get a lot more female attention... but he insisted he didn't want any, and bundled himself up in loose trousers and baggy shirts. Or maybe they were normal sized, and Vincent really was thin. Cloud wasn't sure. But, the man was perplexing. Those looks combined with one of the deepest minds Cloud had ever had the pleasure to paddle in (I mean conversating with Mister Valentine), was one of the main loves in Strife's heart.  
  
Leon. Squall Leonhart had always seemed rather odd. He was a 22 year old man, who still acted like Kevin the teenager.  
  
Yet, something about his "whatever" attitude Cloud found endearing.  
  
The brunette was Cloud's fighting partner at the coliseum, and the two had ended up lovers.  
  
Cloud had a lot of fun explaining that to Vincent.  
  
But then –shock, shock, horror, horror, surprise, surprise- the vampire and the leather-clad youth loved each other.  
  
Ok, to start with there had been a little too much rivalry to be considered friendly, and when Cloud went out, they were yelling at each other. But when Cloud came back, Leon was in the older man's arms.  
  
It was sweet that life had worked out like this.  
  
Then Vincent had his own revelation.  
  
Sephy-sama.  
  
But, then Cloud and Sephiroth got along, and it all worked out. Squall didn't like Sephiroth, but Sephiroth liked everybody.  
  
Back to Leon.  
  
The black leather and scowl seemed to be part of a 17-year-long badass phase Leon was going through.  
  
Cloud had expected him to be a completely different person when he wasn't fighting. You know, turn out to be a soft, sweet guy with a heart of gold.  
  
Cloud had known Leon for three years, and still didn't know if that was ever going to happen. No, Squall remained the evasive, tense, rather taciturn guy he always was and (so it seemed, sadly) always would be.  
  
But he was still nice to be around.  
  
There was more to Squall than that, and Cloud knew it.  
  
The only other side of Leon he had seen was when he was asleep. No matter what position he was in when he fell asleep, he always woke up curled in a ball on his right side, sucking his thumb. Sometimes he spoke in his sleep. To his friends, Cloud assumed. Definitely childhood memories. He couldn't pronounce a lot of words, and he was speaking to someone named "sis". Cloud knew Leon was an only child. It was really weird.  
  
But he smiled more when he was asleep. Cloud liked Leon smiling. He looked really nice, a little younger. More easily hurt. Cloud knew Leon was very easily hurt. Squall had told him himself. In his sleep, through the dreams of a troubled mind.  
  
Listening to him mumble to himself had helped Cloud understand Leon more. The lion was viewing the world through broken glasses and bloodshot eyes. From the look of things, everything that he had liked so far had been shot down, so he aimed low and sunk lower.  
  
Pretty much, the same thing had happened to Cloud himself, but Cloud had just shrunk. Now he was insecure, unsure and generally frightened. He often said "I need you" to Squall, Vincent and Sephiroth. He meant it, deep down, all he needed really was someone to hold his hand when it got too dark and hold him when he shivered.  
  
So now, the incredible, strong, smart, cool, calm, collected Cloud Strife was a nervous wreck who wanted to be babied.  
  
It was enough to make him burst into tears, the pain that had been pent up all this time.  
  
And he did.  
  
Lying in bed, Saturday morning, holding his thoughts, sobbing his eyes out.  
  
He was too busy venting the sorrow to hear Vincent's metallic footsteps up the stairs.  
  
Erm... whaddya think? If you like it, please review. Or I won't bother updating. And if you really don't, all flames are accepted.  
  
**(((I apologize greatly for the characterization of sephy-sama. If I have offended anyone, I'm sorry.  
  
But I needed someone like that and... Well.... Squall is too shut off, Cloud is Cloud and Vincent is higher than that. Not that I'm saying Vinnie is better than sephy!!  
  
I also feel slightly bad for making it clear Squall is a basket case, AND then there's the whole turning-Cloud-into-a-loser thingy.... but I just think it fits...  
  
Sorry if anyone disagrees, but this is my story, and it quite clear if you are actually PAYING ATTENTION you are at least vaguely interested. Doesn't really matter if you aren't.  
  
But if you read through to this, thank you anyway.  
  
Sorry for the OOC.  
  
And a lil explanation to the inspiring mind behind this story (when she isn't feeling pathetic): "I love all the bishis! And I know I can't have them, so I put em with each other!!!")))**


End file.
